the divine "No"

Do you ever have a pivotal conversation with someone that kind of changes your life forever?  When I was in high school, I was talking with a good friend of mine about how I got roped into being on some committee, and he then spoke frankly with me about learning and embracing the divine "No."  I'll never forget it.  He talked about the importance of protecting your time and being willing to say "no" when needed.  While I still constantly have to fight the people-pleaser in me, I have been a protector of my time ever since that conversation.  And I don't think it's a coincidence that the friend who spoke with me is very successful in his work and family life.

The areas I try to protect most are family time and alone time.  Fortunately I married a man who prioritizes our family like I do, and he is willing to turn someone else down if he and I have plans together.  Even if we had just planned to be at home together and do nothing, we protect that. 

I am someone who is rejuvinated through alone time, whether with God or simply through relaxation.  There have been plenty of times I have turned down a girls night or an outing with friends or family because I know I need that time.  Do I sometimes feel guilty?  Sure.  Is it just the people-pleaser showing its ugly head?  Definitely.  We worry we'll hurt someone's feelings.  And maybe they do get their feelings hurt.  Maybe someone does complain about it.  But typically that someone is one who doesn't get it.  It's probably someone who says "yes" to everything and everyone and is more than likely spread thin and miserable.

I have to always go back to the Word.  And it couldn't be clearer that God wants us to protect our time, have priorities, and have a peaceful life...

Be very careful, then, how you live - not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. Ephes. 5:15-16

Seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. Matt. 6:33

Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind... Rom. 12:2

First of all, then, I urge that supplications, prayers, intercessions, and thanksgivings be made for all people, for kings and all who are in high positions, that we may lead a peaceful and quiet life, godly and dignified in every way. 1 Tim. 2:1-2

If someone does not know how to manage his own household, how will he care for God's church? 1 Tim. 3:5

For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also. Luke 12:34

Show me, O Lord, my life's end and the number of my days; let me know how fleeting is my life.  You have made my days a mere handbreadth; the span of my years is as nothing before you.  Each man's life is but a breath. Psalm 39:4-5

Watch your life and doctrine closely.  Persevere in them... 1 Tim. 4:16

And those are just a few.
The point - It's okay to say "no."  It's biblical to protect your time.  It's God's desire for you to live peacefully and with purpose.

If anything, you should feel relief.

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